reaching to grab a piece of the crusty French bread she toasted as
well.
Neither knew what to say to the other during
dinner so they both gladly used food as an excuse for lack of
conversation.
When she wasn’t looking, Achai kept catching glances
at Mel he couldn’t figure out what the hell she was up to. The food was good and
all but she had his nerves on edge and he wasn’t sure how much longer he could
take of this.
Taking a sip of her wine Mel wondered
what he was thinking she was aware that he kept
looking at her. He
probably thought she was crazy this sudden shift in personality was most likely
throwing him for a loop. Taking a large sip of wine for courage she put her
glass down “your probably wondering what this is all
about huh” she
said.
Putting his fork down he grabbed his own glass and took
a sip suddenly feeling like he would need it. “Yes I am are you going to
tell me now”
“Do you still want me?” she asked him bluntly,
her voice shaking.
Looking at her he picked up his glass
again this time taking a large gulp “why would you ask that” he asked her his
voice flat revealing nothing.
Becoming shockingly
irate “oh come on Achai don’t play dumb we’ve been tiptoeing around each other
for the past year” she began to yell “you’re never here anymore and when you are
you don’t look at me, you don’t talk to me, hell can you even remember the last
time you touched me?” she demanded breathing heavily from her outburst of
temper. “You don’t even sleep in the same bed as me hell I don’t even know where
you sleep” looking at him with suspicion.
Still not answering her,
he took a deep breath and looked away. “I still love you if that’s what you are
asking” he answered his voice calm much calmer than hers, which infuriated
her.
“What the fuck does that mean?” she asked him her
face beginning to get red. “It’s a simple question why won’t you answer” a
look of horror suddenly appearing on her face “oh my god do you want a divorce?
Are you having an affair?” she asked tears appearing in her
eyes.
Getting up out of his seat, he rushed to her side and knelt
at her feet. Taking her hands in his he looked at her “baby look at me”; he said
to her his deep voice rumbling straight through her making her even angrier that
even now he could affect her body like this.
Looking away from him,
she shook her head and tried to pull her hands out of his but he was too strong
and wouldn’t let her.
“Look at me. You started this
shit now look at me,” he said letting her see his frustration something he
rarely did. Grabbing her chin in steel like grip and making her face him “You
are the only woman for me” he told her allow her to
see the love in
his eyes. “I’m not having an affair”
Taking a deep
breath, she shook her head believing him wholeheartedly
“I’m
not the only one doing the ignoring around here and the only reason I stay away
so much is you make it so hard to be here” he told her with brutal honesty.
Letting go of her hands he stood up, walking across the room to lean
against
the door, and star at her with an intensity that unnerved
her.
Looking down at her hands “you’re right please sit down
I don’t want to fight that’s not what this night is about”
Sitting
down he moved the candelabra over so he could see her face clearly “what is this
about then” he asked her softly hope in his voice.
“I miss you
baby” she said looking at him with tears spilling down from her eyes
“I
don’t know how we got here but let’s fix it”
“Okay” he said licking
his lips he got up and came to her again “okay baby I don’t want to lose you
either we’ll fix it” he promised her picking up her hand and placing a chaste
kiss in the palm.
Pleased that he still wanted her but aggravated
at his lack of desire for her she began to get agitated all over
again.
Seeing the change in her again “what’s wrong Mel?” he
asked her softly
“Why don’t you want me and don’t lie I can tell”
she asked him again
Opening his mouth to tell her she was wrong she
cut him off.
“When you were home last I went into your laptop
when you were sleeping,” she told him watching him carefully to see how he
reacted.
Looking at her, he began to breathe heavily his anxiety
spiking having suspicions where this line of questioning was
going.
“I saw what those videos you have saved on there. Have you
done that before?” she
asked her tone bland
“No” he
answered her his voice shaky “why did you do that?”
“I thought you
were having an affair but I found that instead” searching his face she cupped
his face loving the look of his 5 o’clock shadow. “Do I not satisfy you is
that what’s wrong with us?” she asked him
Chest heaving he
looked at her his eyes wild with emotion. He was terrified he didn’t want to go
here. Getting up he crossed the room to put distance between them. He couldn’t
breathe she knew he can’t believe she knew. She was going to leave him.
Panicking he looked around the room seeing the bottle of wine he went to it and
drank from it not even bothering with a glass then went back to pacing.